Self-Love: Learning to Love Ourselves Better!

So often in life, we give more to others than to ourselves. Although it is a beautiful act of love to be able to give more than receive, it becomes an issue when we are not giving the same in kind to ourselves. When we don’t fully honor ourselves and practice Self-Love, we may have regret or resentment. We also may suffer from unhappiness and depression. We feel unfulfilled and dissatisfied, because we are not doing what makes us (us), therefore we are not content with who we are.

At times, we may also seek acceptance from external forces instead of internal ones. We seek the approval of our loved ones, employers, social media, friends, and other sources of gratification to feel validated. Although the truth of the complement lies within. We must understand that the true power of our future and happiness coincides with our ability to self-love.

So, what is Self-Love? Simply, Self-Love is LOVE. Simply knowing what love is and appreciating it enough to save a little for ourselves by being kinder, gentler, and sweeter to ourselves.

As we begin the new year, let’s plan to love ourselves better. Without pretense or approval from anyone except ourselves. Loving ourselves better is fundamental to our overall health and well-being. Mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. When we love ourselves, we expect the best for ourselves, we value who we are, and our placement in society. When we acknowledge our worth, we will not allow situations that are not of our highest good to interfere with our progress. Loving ourselves better means setting boundaries that protect our vision and dreams.

Self-love means taking care of ourselves by staying healthy. This includes regular checkups, going to the doctor, exercising, and eating well for a longer, fuller life. We also love ourselves by focusing on mental health through therapy and regular maintenance to properly handle trauma, grief, and emotions.

Self-Love involves creating self-care regimes for ourselves. Setting time to do things that are strictly self-gratifying. Treating ourselves. Spa dates, Stylists, gym time, and alone time are all important.

Loving ourselves means creating time and space for self-appreciation and admiration for who we are and what we have accomplished. Honoring and celebrating ourselves. Self-Love is knowing who we are and knowing the things that make us happy and strengthen us. It is wanting better for ourselves and striving for greater in all areas of our lives.

It’s not being defined or judged by others and accepting who we are as the way we are because we know ourselves, which means we know our own value and worth. When we truly love ourselves, there is no need to compete or compare because there is no need for validation outside of ourselves.

Ways to better self-love

1. Daily affirmations. Create a Self-Love Language. Examples: “I am Unstoppable” I am Beautiful! I love my hair! I love my body! I love who I am and who I am becoming! I Love ME!

2. Create a daily self-care/self-love regime: Exercise; take a walk, do light yoga or stretching, and get to know your body and what it needs.

3. Date Yourself! Put a date on the calendar for a Self-Love date. Treat yourself to a movie. Treat yourself to your favorite meal, go to the spa, get a massage, or go to the barber or stylist.

4. Journal. Create a “ME” book. Free write your desires, your wants, and your goals. Doodle, release your creativity. Write love songs or poetry (to yourself). Use this journal for any form of self-expression that heightens the “YOU” in “YOU”.

5. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Be gentle. We, at times, can be our worst critics, and most of those times it is false perceptions and unrealistic expectations that we have given ourselves. Love who you are at this moment, love every part of you, and see yourself as you are. If there is a need for improvements, do it and be easy.

6. Set Boundaries. Maintain your calm and peace. Know what keeps you centered and productive.

7. Remove Negative Self-Talk! Anytime you find yourself saying something negative about yourself, immediately turn it into a positive. Have compassion for yourself and your journey.

8. Have Gratitude. Express gratitude for who you are, your current accomplishments, and where you are right now. Be grateful for the Gift that “You ARE”.